I’ll admit to ranting, raving, and QQing. I’ll admit to whining that healadins are broken. I’ll admit to struggling. But I can’t admit that I’m not trying because I am, I love healing and yes, I am trying very hard to get it down. I think I have pin-pointed what it is that makes this so complex at the moment. But before I get into it, and the problems I still face, I want to share an anecdote with you.
The Setting: VOA 25
I have thought long and hard about a way to write this without getting mad again. Without getting insulted; but, it is difficult to tell you that I was told I didn’t know how to do my job. First there were 2 things wrong that weren’t healing based, that all the healing in the world couldn’t fix. DPS & tanks. The DPS was not only significantly lower than tank dps, but they didn’t switch to orbs, which means there was never a break from the orbs. The tanks, didn’t know how to taunt properly off one another, meaning their white-out stacks got extrememly high and the fight was lasting too long. No one called them out, no one said “Fix it tanks.” What did they say? “FFS HEALS!” or “WTF NO HEALS!?” but one that really pissed me off, (ps. I feel the anger in my belly right now) was “Well, apparently we need new healers.”
I was NOT the only that defended the healing but I was the only paladin healer. The only tank healer. And when the raid began to fall apart, and the good priest healer who stood up against the hate left, and they fat assed Emalon trash, I left. I had had enough…until…
I see the raid leader in trade chat LFM. His pitch went something like blah blah tanks blah blah 5k and healers that actually know what they’re doing. And dammit if that didn’t break me. You want to know why? Because for once, FOR ONCE, since this stupid patch has dropped, I was feeling confident, I was doing a good job and he needed to point his blame at someone else. I decided that I would promptly point out that his healers HAD been doing what they were supposed to and not to blame them. At which point he promptly said I cared way to much about healing numbers and was busy healing around the raid and I didn’t do my job. After being backed up in trade, reaffirming to myself I was correct, I promptly battled him (ps. I should have left it alone but I was mad). Eventually, it ended with him telling me I didn’t know how to do my job.
But let me retort that I absolutely healed my ass off on those dim-witted tanks who couldn’t figure out what to do (ps. This is not hate against all tanks) and I attest that I felt at the time I had been doing a good job. I don’t care about the meters. Does it upset me that I had fallen so far? Sure. BUT, it was absolutely pleasent surprise to see that I had made it back up in that run to 2nd place (we wiped before and I was in fact near the bottom) so my confidence was not unwarranted. I healed the two tanks and myself (Protector of the Innocent is massive) but the two other people I holy shocked from death weren’t reflected, and there were only two (neither of which caused a tank to die) and one person happened to be the guy bitching at me.
While OBVIOUSLY, there were other factors at play, if he really wanted to blame it on heals (it boils down further to point at his raid leading skills) I suppose he has something in his pocket (but he should have asked given the extent of changes).
I had been so confident, but as all good trolls (or D-bags) can do, he had me doubting…
So, after feeling so incredibly desolate, I read an article that Kurn wrote about her struggles. And so I asked her if she had difficulty two tank healing, hoping beyond all that I am not just a fail whale, this is what she had to say:
We can no longer, IMHO, heal two targets reliably without help. It isn’t always a lot of help that we need, but we can’t solo it.
It is difficult for a paladin to be the only tank healer when there is mass damage, Beacon of Light is NOT what it used to be. I had two healed (me on tanks) 5/12 pre-patch, but I can’t get VOA? While the utility of Beacon of Light certainly plays a part in our tank healing, I think I have it finely pinpointed a major factor.
Our problem is “Reactiveness“.
Is that a real world? No, probably not, but it is for right now.
In the paladin healing right now we are so REactive to procs and cooldowns, that it effects more of our healing choices than actual thought. The general gist is:
- Divine Light is a good use for Speed of Light
- Infusion of Light means you need to do Holy Light
- Holy Shock is up!
- 3 HoPo time to WoG!
- Oh, hey Daybreak!
- HOLY FLASHLIGHT BATMAN, don’t forget Light of Dawn.
- Even the oh SH*T button is on a CD. Hello Lay on Hands (but that is nothing new)
It isn’t reactive to the damage, it isn’t PROactive for damage, it is about procs and cooldowns all the way around.
It seems that the standard rotation has become: HS – DL/HL -HL – HL/FoL – WoG but when you think about it, it would take 3 of these sequences (~18 seconds @ 6 sec CD) to get 3 HoPo for WoG if you are fully utilizing beacon and NOT healing your beacon target. If you use this as a one tank heal, you could pop this rotation ever 6 seconds but lose the utility of Beacon. That is the ultimate problem.A problem each of us have to adapt to and all the leads (raid, healing, guild, etc.) need to acknowledge.
Are we broken? No. But we are missing (at least at 80) the ability to fill negative spaces and be proactive.
I haven’t been in a raid since then. Maybe I lost my mojo or my confidence. I can admit that I am not the best holy paladin, but I am still good at what I do and I will keep at it.
This will be the last rantish type post about the holy paladin stuff. I hope to have viable information on HOW to be successful in the somewhat near future but I feel a little more confident that by knowing what the problem is, I can work to fix it.
And as a last thought, to all the raid leaders, please be aware of the healing status and strengths of all the classes that are available for your raid. As a raid leader, you should have knowledge about all situations and instances so that you can prepare your raid accordingly. What if you were banking on mage CC and you didn’t know they lost Polymorph (ps. that is hypothetical)? This is the same situation in essence.
PS. Thank you to my guild mates who stood up for me in trade chat and for the other healers who had my back.